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Micallef Tonight, episode 13, part 4. (transcribed by
Mouton) Music, MT logo with zooming
night-time traffic thing, audience clap and we see Shaun and Dave O'Neil
talking. Shaun:
Thankyou very much and welcome back.
My next guest has a surname that is the opposite of the music that
he sings. Will you please welcome Mister Keith Urban! MT theme plays. Shaun gets up;
Dave goes to swap seats then stops; Keith comes on and shakes hands with
Shaun, then Dave; Keith, Dave and Shaun sit. Shaun:
Welcome, Keith, welcome. Keith:
Thankyou. Shaun:
I'm sure that observation has been made many times before, has
it? Keith:
That's the first time, actually. Shaun:
Is it really? Keith:
Very skewed. Shaun:
I feel quite honoured. Didn't get much of a laugh, but, I mean,
it's accurate... Shaun:
... historically. Thankyou very much.
Now, thankyou very much for coming on the show. Keith:
My pleasure, very (something) Shaun:
That's very good.
Hard hitting question straight away... Keith:
Alright. Shaun:
... okay, I'm just wondering what the difference is between
Australian country music and American country music? Given that you've
experienced both. Keith:
I don't know.
I grew up listening to a lot of American country, so mine is a
little more like American country, I guess. Shaun:
Did you have to adapt much when you did go to Nashville? 'Cause
you've been in Nashville for ten years or so now. Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
Longer, in fact. Keith:
Yeah, a bit. You know, because it's a shock at first, an Ausie
trying to do country in Nashville. Shaun:
Yeah, 'cause I think I remember you describing (laughs) your
assault on Nashville audiences. I mean, you sort of had a pub-rock
background. Keith:
Yeah, that's where I came from - playing in all the pubs throughout
Sydney and Brisbane - and there's a certain aggression you have to play
with to get people's attention, right, you know. Shaun:
Mmm. Keith:
And in pubs, they just don't care, so you go to Nashville and you
play with that kind of intensity and it just freaks them out. Shaun:
Well, is that because they're more laid-back or they more expect
to... Keith:
Yeah, exactly. Shaun:
They're more music-friendly. Keith:
It's a little more polite, (laughs) which is not where I come
from. Shaun:
Alright.
Dave was in a band. He was in a band called Captain Cocoa. Dave:
Yeah, we were originally called Wah Wah Me, but we had to change.
(To Keith:) Yes, how are ya?
Did you use to do the Beanly Tavern? Keith:
(nods) I've done it many times. Dave:
I've done stand-up there. I survived, which was good. Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
That a hard pub, Dave? Dave:
That's on the Gold Coast highway, isn't it? That's a rough kind of
joint. Keith:
It is a hard place. Dave:
Mmm. Keith:
Well, they sell Beenly rum, so, you know... Dave:
Mmm. Keith:
... it's a ruggard joint. Shaun:
Actually, we found out there was a... I mean, that's Dave's old
band... You had an old band called Obscure Altenatives... Keith:
Yeah... Shaun:
Do you remember that? Keith:
... I did. Yeah. Shaun:
And did you... Keith:
I think we opened for Wah Wah Me at some point. Shaun:
Did you? That's good. And you did Turning Japanese; you obviously
did non-country music at one point, as well. Keith:
That's right. Shaun:
See, we got our research; we know everything. Keith:
I know where you're getting this from though... Shaun:
We actually had a cassette, but it's twenty years old and we didn't
have a cassette-player here at Channel Nine... Keith:
Right. Shaun:
... so we'll have to give it to you for later on.
I was just wondering, though, your first album was called Keith
Urban... Keith:
Right. Shaun:
... and your second album was called Keith Urban... Keith:
No, no. Shaun:
... I was wondering if that was a trend for your swag of albums.
You not gonna call any more Keith Urban? Keith:
No... well, maybe the fourth one. Shaun:
Maybe the fourth one? Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
Alright. That's good.
But why was that? Why would you call two albums Keith Urban? Surely
it can only confuse people? Keith:
Well the first one came out only in Australia and so for
America... Shaun:
Alright, so only 'cause of the stupid people like me.
Now, you've toured with Slim Dusty... Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
... in your past... Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
... and you're going to... in fact, have you toured with Leann
Rimes, yet? Or are you going to tour with Leann Rimes? Keith:
We're coming back to tour with her in October. Shaun:
Alright, but you've not performed with her yet? Keith:
Never even met her yet. Shaun:
Oh alright. You think there'll be much difference between Slim
Dusty and Leann Rimes in terms of... Keith:
(laughs) No, no, it'll be the same thing. Shaun:
Much the same? Keith:
Absolutely. Shaun:
Did you learn much from Slim Dusty when you did tour with him? Keith:
I did and I want to say "G'day" to Slim too, 'cause he's probably
at home watching tonight and enjoying... Shaun:
He's in the audience... Keith:
He's in the audience! Shaun:
... just up the back there. Dave:
Would Slim be awake at... Keith:
Absolutely... Dave:
... (checks watch) half-past ten? Keith:
... he's a trooper. Shaun:
How old is Slim now? Keith:
He's getting on. I'm not sure how old he is, but... Shaun:
Hundred and three, I hear. Keith:
But, no, I did. I learnt a lot from Slim - and we worked with him -
about just being yourself and, get out there and, you know, when you play
to people, just, you've gotta be yourself, 'cause they pick up when you're
faking it. Shaun:
Mmph, right.
In terms of... I s'pose I've asked you about the difference between
the music, the American country music and the Australian country music -
I'm not sure you game me a satisfactory answer, but I'l let it go... What
about the fans in America for country music versus the way audiences
receive your music over here? Are they more fanatical - can I say that? -
in America? Keith:
It's pretty similar, I find.
You know, you get a bunch of drunken people listening to a lot of
rowdy music and it's all pretty much the same. Shaun:
That's right. Dave relies on that for the... Dave:
Yeah. Shaun:
... stand-up work as well. Keith:
There you go. Shaun:
Do you... Dave:
Well, you do have to combat drunk audiences all the time as a
stand-up comedian, so very similar. Dave:
'Cept we don't have the guitar to hide behind, so the bottles can
hit you right here (hand impersonates a bottle flying towards Dave) Shaun:
I'm picturing chicken-wire as well. Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
Do you perform... I mean, have you performed there Keith? Keith:
No, haven't done that. Shaun:
Haven't performed behind chicken-wire? Keith:
No, not yet. Shaun:
We're thinking of doing the show, actually this whole show, behind
chicken-wire... Keith:
That'd be great, wouldn't it? Shaun:
... in a couple of weeks.
The other thing, I suppose, is: You think of somebody like Slim
Dusty or even Smokey Dawson - they probably wouldn't've ever done a nude
centrespread in Playgirl. Keith:
I think you're safe on that one. Shaun:
You think? Keith:
Yeah, that's a safe bet. Shaun:
But, you know, you've done that in the States. Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
Is that... I mean, how does that happen? I mean, how did...
It's obviously not your... I assume that's something that's been put to
you by this magazine. Keith:
Yeah, somebody came and asked me if I would do... I didn't even
know there was a Playgirl. Does anyone know there's... Shaun:
Mmm, no, I've... Keith:
...a Playgirl magazine? Shaun:
... never heard of such a thing. Keith:
I mean, I didn't know that. Shaun:
No, no. Keith:
And... Dave:
Ricky Martin's tryin' to put a stop to that, actually. Yeah,
he's... Shaun:
Hey, Ricky's a friend of mine, alright, and I don't want to hear a
bad word said against him. Dave:
He's still here, that's right. I keep forgetting that. Shaun:
Yeah, alright. Dave:
Mmm, could be bashed. Anyway, don't worry... Sorry. Shaun:
But, I mean, do you... Keith:
I'm just watching! Shaun:
That's alright. I mean, do you... Is this something where you have
to tick the box and do this sort of thing, in the States? Do you think,
you know, is that what the audience demands of you, a bit more than the
music? Keith:
I think, within reason, you do whatever opportunity comes - within
reason - to try and get in the door and get people to listen to your
music, 'cause in the end, it's about people getting to listen to your
music. Shaun:
Mm-hmm. And you'll be... What song are you gonna perform for us
this evening? Keith:
I'm actually not gonna; I'm not performing tonight. It's... Shaun:
Oh, okay. Keith:
It's... Shaun:
Really? Keith:
... October when we come back. Shaun:
October? Oh, October. Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
Alright. Keith:
Yeah, I'll play then, in October. Shaun:
Okay. Well, I'm used to filling, but I don't know whether I can
fill for October. (looks at watch) Will the Sop... Keith:
Were you expecting me to play? Shaun:
The Sopranos fans get tetchy if we're half an hour over, you
know; I can't think they'll wait until Ocotber. (puts watch arm down) Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
But that's alright; we'll work on something. Just a minute... Keith:
Well... Shaun:
Just hang on a sec. (Picks up phone. To phone:) Hi. Is Ricky still
here? He hasn't been listening to Dave, has he? Dave laughs. Shaun:
Alright, okay. (Covers receiver and speaks to Keith and Dave)
Apparantly he's already down at the tram-stop.
(To phone:) Will you pop down and ask him to come back, 'cause
apparantly... (Covers mouth and speaks quietly:) Can't talk 'cause he's
here. (Back to normal:) Keith's let us down, you know, he's as bad as
Leann Rimes; he's not performing. Right, you ask him to come back.
Alright, thanks. (Hangs up. To Keith and Dave:)
We'll be fine. Keith:
Are we covered? Shaun:
I think he might cover for you.
Look, but I'll show up the cover of your CD. Keith:
Good on you, mate. Shaun:
If that's alright. (Holds up CD)
Okay, that's Keith's new CD. Cover has a picture of Keith,
"Keith Urban" in big letters and a small "Golden Road" beneath
it. Shaun:
It's called... Well, it's sort of called Keith Urban, your name's
pretty big there! It's the third album called Keith Urban, subtitled
Golden Road. We should show the actual title. Golden Road.
(Looks to other side of desk, picks up a CD and places it in front
of Keith's) And there's Ricky's. (Puts it back) I won't show that.
(Shuffles around and looks through more CDs)
Actually, there's another on here, isn't ther? (Still looking) Oh,
where is it? Just a minute.
(Picks up a CD and flips it over to read it) Here we are. No, who's
that one? No, that's not you. That's... I don't know who that is. We'll
show that up anyway! (shows CD to camera) There's another one there.
There's an album, by someone, I just found on the desk. (CD cover says
"Ten tracks at a reasonable PRICE". Shaun puts it back and laughs as he
keeps shuffling through a pile of things on his desk).
Alright. No, I had another one here, Keith. Keith:
What are you doing, mate? Shaun:
I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know.
(Slides on chair back to Keith, with another CD to go in front of
the camera: Midnight to Dawn) Here's Dave Graney's, there! There's Dave
Graney's new one.
(Puts Dave G's CD back to reveal Keith's) No, but that's Keith.
That's the one we're talkling about here. You're gonna be back in October
and we very much look forward to that. Keith:
We are. Looking forward to coming home too. Shaun:
And can I ask you, are awards important to you? Because you've
received awards: (checks something on desk) most recent one.. Oh, it's not
the most recent one, I s'pose... it's the US Country Music Association
"Horizon Award" for best new talent. Keith:
Yeah. Shaun:
You can only get that once. Keith:
That's right. Yeah, absolutely. Shaun:
Are they important to you? Do you have that in a position of honour
in your home? Keith:
My mum's actually got it. Shaun:
Mm-hmm. Keith:
The Horizon Award that I won - we were touring at the time and it
was in Los Angeles where they had the awards show - and they gave me the
award without the plaque on the front, right, 'cause they send them out
later... Shaun:
Okay, right. Keith:
... so I got this big trophy on my bus and it was driving me
insane, so I got out a pocket-knife and carved "ME" (mimes doing this)
into the front of it so I knew whose it was. Shaun:
Oh right. Yes. Keith:
So they send me the plaque, later on, to stick on it and I put it
on there, I take my time (mimes carefully straightening plaque) and I put
it on there really carefully and I'm marvelling at it, and my mum's
visiting me and she say, "The year's wrong," 'cause it's got two-thousand
and I won it in two-thousand and one. Shaun:
Right. Keith:
So I'm trying to peel it off quickly before it sticks. And I'm
ripping it off and it gets all mangled and bits of wood are chipping off
and everything. And I take the plaque back into the award place and I
said, "This has got the wrong year." They said, "No actually, that is,
because you win it from the previous year's body of work. So that is
correct, so you need to put that back on your trophy." Shaun:
So they just gave it back to you? Keith mimes trying to stick
plaque back on to mangeld trophy. Shaun:
Well. Keith:
It was hopeless. But Mum has that right now. Shaun:
Well ... no Logie for you!
Now, we've got your tour dates here and you'll be touring in
October... Up comes: "KEITH URBAN (WITH
LEANN RIMES)" and tour dates for Brissie, Newcastle, Wollongong, Sydney,
Melbourne and Adelaide (22nd - 29th Oct.) "TICKETS ON SALE
NOW" Shaun:
... as you said there, with Leann Rimes.
And we'd love to have you on the show with Leann. We've often
wanted Leann on the show, but we keep forgetting to book her. Keith:
Right. That's... Shaun:
It'd be nice if we know that she's in town, that'd be superb. Keith:
(says something) Shaun:
Now, I just want you to do me a favour, if you could, 'cause I have
a segment called High Horse... Keith:
Mm-hmm. Shaun:
... and my knee's a bit bad - I dunno if anyone told you - ... Keith:
I've heard. Shaun:
... and I just wondered if you'd help me out on the
high-horse? Keith:
I can, actually. Shaun:
Just as I gingerly mount that stair, if you could help me, that
would be... 'cause you're a country and western guy, you're a cowboy kind
of guy and I'm a bit country myself... Keith:
Right. Shaun:
... as you can see. (Points to high-horse) I've got a hat up there.
It's a pretty impressive hat. Keith:
So do you want me to... Well, I'm leaving for Nashville, like, on
Wednesday. Do you want me to come back to do it? Shaun:
Yeah, well we're actually running over, so, yeah, if you could come
back next week... Keith:
Next week. Shaun:
... that'd be good. Keith:
You want me to come back from Nashville to do that. Shaun:
Would you mind doing that? Keith:
Alright. Shaun:
I don't think that's an unreasonable request. Keith:
No, I'll do it. Shaun:
Okay, that's good. Alright. Phone rings. Shaun:
'Scuse me. Just talk amongst yourself. (Picks up phone) While Shaun talks on the
phone: Dave:
Hello. How are you, Keith? Keith:
Pretty good, mate. Dave and Keith continue
talking. Meanwhile: Shaun:
(to phone:) Hello? Oh, fantastic. Alright. Okay. (laughs) Okay.
(still laughing) Okay, see you later. Okay, that's good. (hangs up)
Prick.
Okay, apparantly, Ricky is here. Keith:
Right. Shaun:
He's gonna cover for you, which is good. You'll come back next week
to help me on the high-horse. Keith:
I'll do it. Shaun:
Dave, I'll never see you again. Dave:
(Shrugs extravagantly) No. Shaun:
Ladies and gentlemen, it's my great pleasure now to introduce...
he's appeared on more TV sets than a VCR last week, but tonight he's
ours... Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Mister Ricky Martin! Shan stretches ou this arm to
point over at Ricky, there is a close-up of a board saying "Ricky Martin",
the stage curtains finish opening to reveal Ricky and a bunch of musos and
Mr. Marting sings Jaleo. They don't even bother waiting fo the applause to
stop, which goes on a few seconds into the song. During a musical
interlude mid-song, the cameras focus on the musicians and completely
ignore Ricky's outrageous dancing, of which can be seen a flinging arm
occasionaly when the cameras don't pan away quick enough to avoid him,
which they seem to be trying to do. After one and a half minutes of song,
it stops and the audience scream hysterically yet again. Ricky:
Thankyou very much. Shaun:
(To camera quietly, during screaming of audience:) And we'll be
right back after this. Pre-recorded Jaleo pipes up as
Shaun goes up and shakes hands with Ricky. He flourishes at Ricky as
though he is a marvelous trophy while the audience applauds, then Ricky
does it to him. They keep alternatiting for a while, the camera zooms out,
"MICALLEF TONIGHT" is superimposed and the laster ever MT ad break
begins. Ad break.
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