Ask
Francis' Knee
August 2005
Dear Francis'
Knee,
Are you the only knee that talks or does Francis's other knee talk? If so
do you get along well with him?
- Daniel
Greetings Daniel,
Well, no, I am the only one of Francis' knees who talks. The other knee
has been mute since birth and communicates through blinking; 10 blinks for
yes, 11 for no. Frankly I think he's over-doing it.
Yours Audibly,
Francis' Knee
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Dear Francis' Knee,
It's not like that at all. What do you think?
- Genghis
Hello Genghis,
You're right, its not like that at all, and I think that John Howard
should take it back to where he bought it for a refund!
Yours incensed,
Francis' Knee
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Dear
Francis' Knee,
Mr Francis' Knee, whatever happened to robot jones? Also, why a
penguin?
- Smelly Von Brown Shirt
Dear Smelly Von Brown Shirt,
I believe Robot Jones was attacked in a dark alley and axed. As for
the penguin, I do not know but what you choose to go dressed as to a
fancy dress party is up to you.
Yours costumedly,
Francis' Knee
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Dear Francis' Knee,
Science the dawn of time monkey has bread & cross bread with
strange & wonderful forms of monkey until at a time
approximating 0ad a species much like the current alpaca was born
with such traits as a jutting chin, disposable thumb and Pentium
processor the ooman thought it best to enslave & consume all
forms of life, this enlightened being went on to rape &
domesticate other peaceful, benign & inquisitive races the
oomans intelligently named "weak prey" on other worlds.
Until the billennium bug caused coolant rods to randomly move in
& out of the smjit-class reactors (note: after continued
cloning Einstein(s) the theory was the original was a dullard this
is not true, the Eines realized that world leaders will always
want to be he-man (not a good thing when they were actually a
combination of Skelletor & Mr T) and instead turned his
efforts to creating electronic music) much like the incident at
chernobyl causing astronomers in distant galaxies to go blind.
These blind astronomers would, inspired, create yoyos. Um and I
would like to send Shaun an email could I get an address?
Propelled by the blast small fragments of the human genome
penetrated the flesh of some small creatures in another dimension
causing the cute things to go insane. In this period of
enlightened mental activity the soft furry lotecs created fire.
Unfortunately for the Lotecs their entire atmosphere was flammable
and they duly perished in screaming agony. The domino effect
continued from galaxy to galaxy until god fell asleep & dreamt
of a flame & brimstone dungeon for all his creations, he
chuckled in his sleep
- Arma
Dear Arma,
Sorry, what?
Francis' Knee
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Dear
Francis' Knee,
Why does Shaun love goats?
- Mathew McHugh
Dear Mathew,
I mean really, who doesn't like goats?
Yours Goatily,
Francis' Knee
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Dear Francis' Knee,
Hi, I was wondering..when is this site going to be
updated? I come on everyday only to find it is the
same old stuff.
- Koolia
Hi Koolia,
Websites to not magically appear! Unlike clean washing,
which does.
Have patience…!
Yours reminding you that the site was recently
overhauled and given a new look,
Francis' Knee
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